I Quit!

Following is a supposed letter of resignation from an employee at a computer company, to her boss, who apparently resigned very soon afterwards! It's Funny, but a bit harsh.......

Dear Mr. Smith,

As a graduate of an institution of higher education, I have a few very basic expectations. Chief among these is that my direct superiors have an intellect that ranges above the common ground squirrel. After your consistent and annoying harassment of my co-workers and me during the commission of our duties, I can only surmise that you are one of the few true genetic wastes of our time.

Asking me, a network administrator, to explain every little nuance of everything I do each time you happen to stroll into my office is not only a waste of time, but also a waste of precious oxygen. I was hired because I know how to network computer systems, and you were apparently hired to provide amusement to myself and other employees, who watch you vainly attempt to understand the concept of "cut and paste" for the hundredth time.

You will never understand computers. Something as incredibly simple as binary still gives you too many options. You will also never understand why people hate you, but I am going to try and explain it to you, even though I am sure this will be just as effective as telling you what an IP is. Your shiny new iMac has more personality than you ever will.

You walk around the building all day, shiftlessly looking for fault in others. You have a sharp dressed useless look about you that may have worked for your interview, but now that you actually have responsibility, you pawn it off on overworked staff, hoping their talent will cover for your glaring ineptitude. In a world of managerial evolution, you are the blue-green algae that everyone else eats and laughs at. Managers like you are a sad proof of the Dilbert principle. Since this situation is unlikely to change without you getting a full frontal lobotomy reversal, I am forced to tender my resignation, however I have a few parting thoughts.

1. When someone calls you in reference to employment, it is illegal for you to give me a bad recommendation. The most you can say to hurt me is "I prefer not to comment." I will have friends randomly call you over the next couple of years to keep you honest, because I know you would be unable to do it on your own.

2. I have all the passwords to every account on the system, and I know every password you have used for the last five years. If you decide to get cute, I am going to publish your "favorites list", which I conveniently saved when you made me "back up" your useless files. I do believe that terms like "Lolita" are not usually viewed favorably by the administration.

3. When you borrowed the digital camera to "take pictures of your Mother's birthday," you neglected to mention that you were going to take pictures of yourself in the mirror nude. Then you forgot to erase them like the techno-moron you really are. Suffice it to say I have never seen such odd acts with a sauce bottle, but I assure you that those have been copied and kept in safe places pending the authoring of a glowing letter of recommendation. (Try to use a spell check please; I hate having to correct your mistakes.)

Thank you for your time, and I expect the letter of recommendation on my desk by 8:00 am tomorrow. One word of this to anybody, and all of your little twisted repugnant obsessions will be open to the public. Never f*** with your systems administrator. Why? Because they know what you do with all that free time!

Wishing you a grand and glorious day,
Cecelia

Airline Meal Codes

Last month, when I was flying back from Taipei to KL, the passenger next to me ordered a Hindu Meal. For a Indian food loving Malaysian, after a month or so in Taipei you will figure how much I wanted to have that. So when I was back, I talked to Celina and then when to google for this list. This is the list i managed to compiled from various sources.

MEAL CODES IN SSR (Special Service Request)

AVML - Asian Vegetarian Meal
BBML - Baby/Infant Food
BLML - Bland Meal
CHML - Child Meal
CVML - Chinese Vegetarian Meal (SQ Specific)
DBML - Diabetic Meal
FPML - Fruit Meal (Platter)
GFML - Gluten-Free Meal
HFML - High Fiber Meal
HNML - Hindu Meal (Non-Vegetarian)
IVML - Indian Vegetarian Meal (UA Specific)
JPML - Japanese Meal (LH Specific)
KSML - Kosher Meal
KVML - Kosher Vegetarian Meal (UA Specific)
LCML - Low Calorie Meal
LFML - Low Cholesterol/Low Fat Meal
LPML - Low Protein Meal
LSML - Low Sodium/No Salt Added
LVML - Low Fat Vegetarian Meal (SQ Specific)
MOML - Moslem Meal
NFML - No Fish Meal (LH Specific)
NLML - Non-Lactose Meal
OBML - Japanese Obento Meal (UA Specific)
ORML - Oriental Meal
PRML - Low Purin Meal
RVML - Raw Vegetarian Meal
SFML - Seafood Meal
SPML - Special Meal, Specify Food (can be birthday cakes, champagne)
VGML - Vegetarian (Vegan/Non-Dairy) Meal
VLML - Vegetarian (Lacto-Ovo/Milk/Eggs) Meal
VMML - Macrobiotic Vegetarian Meal (SQ Specific)

Other Non-Standard Meals
PFML - Peanut Free Meal (rarely offered cause hard to guarantee)
TDML - Toddle Meal (Years 1-2)
NVML - Non-Vegetarian Meal
JNML - Jain Meal (EK Specific) [strict vegetarian excluding root vegetables]
STVG - Strict Vegetarian Meal

... now who took my PRML?

Legal and Formal Adverbs

Legal and Formal Adverbs
taken from encarta.com

i got all messed up when i tried to read my S&P for my condo so i decided to hit the books (encarta for this matter)

and found a link to "A Guide for Legal Writing in Plain English" too :P

hereafter
in any following part: in a subsequent part of an article or document
hereby

hereby
by this means: by means of this declaration, document, or ruling
I hereby renounce all claim to the estate.

herein
in this document: in this document, article, or proceeding
Disclaimer: The views represented herein do not necessarily represent the views of the moderators.

hereinafter
later in this document: later in this document, article, or proceeding
the Federal Reserve Board (hereinafter referred to as FRB)

hereinbefore
earlier in this document: earlier in this document, article, or proceeding

hereinto
into this matter: into this matter, situation, or place

hereof
concerning this: of or concerning this

hereon
after this: following immediately after this

hereto
to this document or matter: to this document, proceeding, or matter

heretofore
up until now: up until this time
He had more liberty now than he had known heretofore.

hereunder
after this: after this introduction, heading, or sentence
by the terms of this: by the terms of this instruction, agreement, or ruling

hereunto
to this document: to this document, proceeding, or matter

hereupon
on this matter: on this point, subject, or matter
retired to deliberate before pronouncing hereupon

herewith
by this statement: by this statement, ruling, or document
I herewith pronounce sentence of banishment.


notwithstanding
nevertheless: nevertheless or in spite of this
They, notwithstanding, persisted in their inquiries.


thereabout
near that place or number: near that place, amount, number, or time
We're expecting twenty guests or thereabouts.

thereafter
after that time: after that time or from that time on
She graduated from college and shortly thereafter found a good job.

thereat
at that time: at that time or place
for that reason: because of that

thereby
by means of that: by means of or because of that
Interest rates may fall, thereby discouraging investment.
in connection with that: in connection with or with reference to that
Thereby hangs a tale.

therefor
for that: for this, that, or it ( archaic )

therefore
and so: and so, or because of that
This statement is true; therefore that statement must be false.
accordingly: accordingly, or to that purpose
We were forbidden to attend and therefore stayed at home.

therefrom
from there: from that place or thing ( archaic or formal )

therein
in that matter: in that matter, respect, or detail
Therein lies the problem.

thereinafter
from then on: from then on in something, especially a legal document

thereinto
into that place: into that place or thing ( archaic )

thereof
of that: of or about that
a levy of $50 per annum or part thereof
from that cause: from that as a reason or cause

thereon
on that: on the place or surface just mentioned
a metal plate with an inscription thereon
on that point: regarding the point just mentioned ( archaic )
income and capital expense, including tax thereon

thereto
to that: to that thing just mentioned

theretofore
before then: before or up to that time

thereunder
below that: below that, or after that, especially in a legal document

thereupon
upon that point: upon or concerning that point

therewith
with that: with that, or as well as that


whereabouts
in what place: in, at, or near what location
Do you know whereabouts the hotel is?
I've forgotten whereabouts I parked the car.

whereafter
after which: after which time or event
She left, whereafter he also departed.

whereas
because: for the reason that ( formal )
Whereas you've proven your worth, you're welcome to join the team.
connects series of clauses: used to introduce each clause in a series ( formal )

whereat
to or at which place: toward or at which place

whereby
by means of which: by means of or through which
the invention whereby he made his millions

wherefore
because of which: for which reason

wherefrom
from what place: from what place or origin ( archaic )
Do we know wherefrom this stranger comes?

wherein
how: in what way or respect
Wherein did I misspeak myself?
where: in which place ( archaic )
the country wherein they dwelled

whereinto
into which: into which place or thing ( archaic )

whereof
of what person or thing: of or about what person or thing
Do you know whereof you speak?

whereon
where: on which thing or place
the couch whereon she lay

wheresoever
wherever: used as an emphatic form of "wherever"

whereto
to which: where or to which
the place whereto you've brought me

whereunto
( archaic ) See whereto

whereupon
on which: on or upon which
the pillow whereupon she laid her head

wherewith
with which: with or by means of which ( archaic )
the tool wherewith the deed was done



howsoever
( formal or archaic ) Same as however

whatsoever
at all: used to emphasize a negative statement, after words such as "none," "no one," and "anyone"
"Did you have any doubts?" - "None whatsoever."

whensoever
whenever: used as an intensive form of "whenever"

whomsoever
emphatic form of "whomever": an emphatic form of "whomever" ( formal )

whosoever
emphatic form of "whoever": an emphatic form of "whoever" ( formal )

whichsoever
( archaic ) Same as whichever

there's no whysoever :)